Back then, everytime you kept away from me felt like a time for austerity and penance... I would just feel myself immersing into the river of Silence: I had nothing to say to anyone. If I did not become a hermit for the period that you were away, I would feel desolate, lonely. And each time you were away I was forced to play a more active role, precisely because you were not there. Naturally I would feel disturbed and irritated. At times I would even wish to become a burning pyre...
This time, so different from then, I am glad that you were actually coming away to me. Instead of being killed by the void created by your absence, this time a week in my life actually blossomed with your presence!
And yet, and yet, now when you have headed back home, I wish I could have blossomed in your life too....
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